Love Is Like A Trident

Ahh, so now I'm a little loose and ready to share some wisdom. Here is a list I've compiled of the various types of relationships:

1. Love & Love - There has been enough written about this.
2. Love Him/Her - This is historically famous for causing trouble. Many a great things have gone awry because one party has been in love with the other, whilst the latter is relatively uninterested. Shit really hits the fan if they engage in sexual relations. Physical contact has taken place with the two people.
3. Pseudo Love - This is when a person imagines they are in love with someone for their qualities. They are infatuated with certain aspects of the person's physical/mental makeup. The emotion never reaches a deeper feeling and is relegated to a perceived love on the surface. This is different from #2 as there is no physical involved, ever.
4. Sex Partners (previously known as Fuck Buddies) - This is when good friends like to hump. You'll often hear the term: "Friends with benefits". Does this imply your other friends have no benefits? Fuck you then, I'm not ever buying you another drink. You can also kiss your Christmas card goodbye.
5. Convenience - This is not a very common situation, but it still exists. Two (possibly more) people are together for a common reason. They hold no deep emotions or ideals, but exist together as a simple means to an end.
6. Imagined - Similar to #'s 2 & 3, the difference lies within one person on the delusional level. They act in a manner not normal to their usual self and act in a generally insane manner. They are convinced that the opposite person is their mate for eternity. No level of dissuasion is possible.
7. Broken Love - This is the bottom of the barrel. This the most painful emotion that one can feel. Two people are in love, they are forced/pulled apart by outside influences that they have no control over. This situation leads to many developments in a person's life, sometimes it leads to the end. This kind of relationship can have shattering effects on someones pysche.

Many other types of relationships within this realm can be stated. However, they can all be traced to the above. Ultimately, relationships with other people are the most simple, complex endeavour you can partake in. One way or another you will be educated, confused, sad, happy, angry, ecstatic, and finally a better person.

"On the hit parade of love I know I'll never stop
I've got a long long way to climb before I reach top
But if I do get there soon I'd really have it made
Then I'll know I'm number one your lover's hit parade" - Jimmy Martin

A Day in the Life (Of a Sexyredkid in Korea)

So at the behest of some of my amigos (actually no one asked me for this but I like the way the previous grouping of words sounds, so piss on your shoes), I feel it would be proper to document a day in the life of what I do here in this rice eating peninsula. Here it goes:

8:00am-9:00am = This is the worst part of my day. Waking up this early to do anything non-recreational is stupid. It takes me awhile to drag my ass out of bed, so I watch the news till I get pissed off. Then I make some coffee, check my email, go the bathroom, smoke 2-3 cigarettes and eat some sort of sustenance.

10:35am = Show up at the school. The school once asked me to show up 30 minutes before my 1^st class (10:50am). I tried to explain that it is a waste of time, and I’m always prepared for my 1^st class. They then said it was a rule. I told them it was a waste of my time that I was not getting paid for. They then shut up.

10:50am-11:55am = 6 year old Kindergarten class. I have about 7 little demons that are proficient in looking cute and making each other cry. They don’t speak much English, so it’s a lot of colors, numbers, games, songs, and general kindergarten mish mash.

12:00-12:35pm = Lunchtime. I help get the kids their lunch, and then the other teacher and I take turns singing this dumb ass song. It’s about thank you or some other drudgery that makes my head hurt. I then ask the kids what they have for lunch. Every kid knows at least two answers: Rice and Kim Chi.

12:35pm-1:40pm = This is one of my favorite classes. Four boys, 5 years old and full of energy. They learn quickly and don’t cry when I throw them out the window for doing stuff, like crying.

2:00pm-2:25pm = Now the elementary kids are here. My first class has progressed excellently. They can now understand most of what I say.

3:00pm-3:30pm = Another Kindergarten class. These are good kids who I enjoy teaching.

3:35-4:05pm = This class is my future ex-con class. They aren’t that bad, but they excel at not listening and making derogatory comments to each other.

4:10pm-4:40pm = This a class of beginners. They are nice kids, but we have just moved past the alphabet.

4:45pm-5:15pm = Finally a class I can somewhat talk to. This is one of my best classes and I’ve seen these guys progress rather quickly.

5:20-6:30pm = I get a useless 1 hour break. Why is it useless? Because the damn bank and post office are closed!

6:30pm – 7:00pm = The end of the day consists of my higher level classes. This a fun class. We read the newspaper, talk about stupid stuff, and make fun of each other. Some of these kids are really smart. One kid can even spell “congratulation”, making him smarter than 2/3 of my nuclear family.

7:05pm-7:35pm = Essentially the same as above, but a little more advanced. I can have more in depth conversations.

7:40-8:10pm = My final class is relatively advanced in their English speaking. They are a nice class and well behaved. I’ve got no complaints.

8:10pm-8:30pm = Finish up whatever I need to do. Prepare for my first 1 or 2 classes for the next day. Stare at the wall.

8:30pm = I get home and cook myself dinner. I’ll play around on the internet or play Xbox for a little while. If I have insomnia, then I’m up pretty late. I’ll go out to eat with some people a couple of times a week.

Fucking boring huh? I’ll give you a prize if you made it this far. Don’t worry my next post will be more alcohol laden.